Tuesday, March 24, 2009
DVD Review: Quarantine
Review by 42nd Street Pete
First off, I hadn’t seen a film that sucked this bad in years. Here we have another shitty, palmcorded Clover Field clone that is a darkly shot, incoherent mess. You have to be a really crappy film maker to rely on this format, proving that anyone who got that $119.95 special from Best Buy is now a ‘Film Maker”.
This steaming pile of dog shit follow two news people following two paramedics. The woman of the team and “star” of the film, Jennifer Carpenter, is just a whiny, chickenshit bitch that you want to see die early on, but keeping this film mired down seems to be the key as she is around until the bitter end. A call to a run down apartment house has the team, including two cops, trapped in the building as the Government seals it up.
I’ll spare you the first hour of darkly lit, shaky palm corder bullshit and cut to the chase: Some bio terrorist is living there and has created a mutant strain of rabies. At this point I will refer my readers to Rabid 1977 and I Drink Your Blood 1971 which dealt with rabies and you could actually see what the hell was going on. You don’t identify with the characters, mainly because you can’t really see them and no one stands out. Everybody dies and everybody connected with this film should die also. People say that this could be the best horror film this year. If you expectations are that low, it probably is. The two big remakes, Friday the 13th, & Last House on the Left reportedly sucked, next up is the Elm Street & Halloween II remakes which will also suck. So if this is the bright spot & the “best horror film this year” it may be time for me to re evaluate my love of the genre and stick to what I like, old school films, instead of this idiotic, copycat dreck. That picture of the girl on the box says it all. The expression on her face looks like she’s being ass raped and after one viewing, the viewer will probably feel the same way.